where get-tough girls turn into goldmines

okay.

i went back to the blockbuster tonight. i returned the silly movies i got last night, and got one more silly one and one i'm sort of excited and scared about, all about my mother. i've heard such good things about pedro, and i really liked talk to her, so we'll see how it goes. i hear it's about families and love and grief, however, which is the source of the being afraid. a really good movie can sometimes say the things i can't. for other examples, see: 21 Grams; Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter....and Spring; Magnolia; Garden State; and The Ice Storm, among others.

geez, that was a noun and verb nightmare.

anyway, the point is that i think this blockbuster employs people specifically to ask me personally if i'm still doing okay. this time there was no "ma'am," but there was a "are you having any trouble?" which.....no. i'm pretty used to the process at this point. thanks. and thanks for not calling me ma'am. and....what? oh. no, no i don't want to buy any used dvds. uh...yeh, i understand that they're two for one and i ju.....huh? no. no, that's okay. no really, it's really oka......alright. thanks. yes, i'm still okay. okay. right. tha.....listen i......yes. shit, no i meant no. i don't want to sign up for free movies all the time for the flat fee. well, i just don't have ti.......it's just i'm really bus....with what? i don't think you're allowed to ask me that. what? no, i'm not getting defen......are we dating? because i feel like we are, and it's just not working for me anymore. i know. sorry. see you around.

thanks, God, for making me a large body of water, perfectly ionized to attract the lightning storm that is the screwballs of the world. i appreciate it. makes for interesting days.

so! blockbuster. and something else i was going to say, which.....oh yes. two things:

1) i received an invitation to sign up for gmail today. what do i do? i've had my current email address for something like five years now. wow. should i change over? and if i do, am i a poser? i mean, all the cool kids have gmail, don't they? and if i do, then what should my address be? this is too stressful.

2) my birthday is coming up, and we're going to the zoo! because i love the zoo. i came to this conclusion while sitting at a red light on the way home (not the love for the zoo, that's always been there), and it's a little expensive (nine bucks), but that's what's going down. and there's the rainforest. and i haven't been since.....1998. wow. so that's the deal. the zoo and some food (but not zoo food), and no presents or cards necessary but certainly appreciated. no pressure. i'm excited. okay, that's it.

robot and i are hanging out with aimee mann at the moment, thanks to mr lynch, and we're having a good time. i'm a sucker for anybody with some nice little piano in the background and an actual melody. these things are important. we can't always be chilling it out with cigarettes and atonal guitars, now can we? no way.

also what's weird is that she sang "voices carry," which......wasn't that cyndi lauper? i guess not. and she doesn't sound anything like that any longer. huh. cheers, though. carry on.

okay. it's time for some leftover dos amigos and some "summer peach iced tea," which can be a little overwhelming at first but pretty delicious on the whole. and so instant!

ZAM!