maybe tomorrow

maybe today isn't the day to drink coffee, to leave the house (funny how house isn't a physical thing sometimes), to eat any sugar, to think very thoroughly about anything instead of just touching on things momentarily, to go to ethics and lose my temper just at the beginning over something so small, to say "i have an anger problem" with a laugh and get some more, to hear "i can't imagine you getting angry over anything, or maybe with a half-smile" and just because it's true and i wish myself i could get that half-smile off my face, to pick up some money, to get a birthday present and give it on time, to go see my professor to help clean up her office a little bit off the clock, to study for my corporations exam, to update this online journal, to see the devastator and all that goes with it, to rent or maybe watch movies, to order a pizza and eat it but only after i've calmed down, to stay calm and relax and not freak out now don't freak out, to talk about this any longer.