welcome to it.

greetings from the kitchen of one hundred thirty and one-half twenty-fifth avenue east. there are some gerber daisies to my right and a guitar-strumming katie meyer to my left. we are waiting. soon we will not be waiting any longer and will be drinking some decidedly delicious coffee. and then i will lament my zip code, for the fifty-three thousandth time. this morning. no no, i exaggerate, i mean, in the last twenty-four hours.

there are a lot of numbers in this entry, have you noticed? ever since i finished that number puzzle on the plane, in the biggest surprise of the century, my confidence in such things has been semi-restored. restored? that's the wrong word. considering i don't even like seeing numbers as they are and much prefer to use the words that belong to them, there is no restoration that needs doing.

the addle by the sea is filled with things that are almost too much and too real, and so nice and a little sad, and relief relief relief. of course. i am trying to remember all the things i want to, and so far okay? also imagine the cigarettes i have not smoked, the beer i have not drunk, and the fun i have not had. when you imagine it, you will be left with nothing at all. maybe that will change, just like that, but something tells me that has become impossible.

embrace all this real feeling! with both eyes open but unafraid(?) to be closed, and two open palms for once. done and done.